It’s Not About the Day

First published: June 19, 2016 – Father’s Day

Today marks the second time in seven years I’ve spent Father’s Day away from my two sons. Moreover, my dad lives 150 miles away, and my step-dad is 600 miles south. Despite this annual distance from my dads on Father’s Day, Denise generously celebrates my fatherhood by prompting our boys for bigger smiles and longer hugs to accompany several handmade gifts and cards. It’s a day I cherish and anticipate with excitement every year, more so than my birthday.

Today is a bit different. I’m in New Orleans working at the premier international tour and travel marketplace on domestic soil. Thanks to technology, I can still connect with my boys. And that’s okay. My Father’s Day was last Thursday and included go-karts, laser tag and miniature golf. Today I received hugs through FaceTime.

Father’s Day isn’t about the day or even about the man. It’s about relationship. Today is the day we celebrate the blessing of fatherhood and the paternal connection between kids and their dads. But it doesn’t have to be today! While over 60 countries have declared the third Sunday in June as Father’s Day, numerous others celebrate dads on various dates throughout the year. For instance, Father’s Day won’t arrive in Luxembourg until October 2nd. Residents of Bulgaria won’t celebrate until December 26.

Father’s Day isn’t about the day. It isn’t about the man. It’s about relationship.

Some of you have lost your father recently or grew up without him in your life. You may have a very strained relationship with your dad or children. You may be separated from the child you love. Several of my friends have mixed emotions today as they long to be a fathers but are still awaiting this future reality. My friends, if you find yourself facing pain on this day, remember that today is only one day. Certainly it’s a day set aside to honor fathers, but another day arrives tomorrow.

I’m not saying I didn’t feel a tinge of sadness when I realized my work travel would include June 19. I did. I even considered altering my flight schedule to secure a few moments with my kids at home. But it’s one day, and our relationship will not be defined by this day any more than a marriage is defined by the wedding day. Relationships are built over months, years and decades of care and connection.

If you find yourself hurting this Father’s Day, I pray you will find rest in knowing it’s not about the day. If today brings grief, I pray tomorrow brings hope. Hope that you can reconcile past hurts and move toward a future full of joyful relationships.

If today brings only happiness, then take a moment to thank God for your dad, and remember those whose story is very different.

Make a choice today to build better relationships tomorrow- with your dad, with your children, with everyone you know.

Happy Father’s Day.

Question: How has your father impacted your life? Comment below and help others to grow.

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It’s Not About a Day first appeared on From Where I Sit.